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Los Plantanos Imposters

Los Plantanos Vs CIA imposter Plantains

Over the years Los Plantanos rose from humble beginnings in the South American jungle to be the most endearing duo in Kaiju Big Battel. As their popularity grew, the US government interpreted Kaiju's beloved freedom fighting Plantains as a threat to national security. The Homeland Security Guards were apparently afraid the Twin's revolutionary ideals would endanger an already unstable America. The popularity polls of Mr. President were way down as a result of a Coast Guard draft dodging scandal. Presidential aides warned Mr. President that the possibility of a Plantain revolt were low but could cripple his chances of re-election. Mr. President wasn't taking any chances, and in his own words he "let the dogs out on them Plantain boys."

The South American Sock Puppet Dictator had been trying to eradicate the Plantain brothers for years and was delighted when the Homeland Security Guards arranged a secret meeting to conspire to destroy their common enemy. The US government had been pulling the strings of the Sock Puppet Dictator for years so it didn't take more than a dozen Apache helicopters and a truckload of Goutendiva chocolate bars and K-rations to seal the deal. After a series of underground bunker board meetings, the CIA Imposter Plantains were raised on South American soil and trained with American dollars and CIA special ops field manuals. The CIA-Sock Puppet Dictator joint plan to destroy Los Plantanos was simple. First, steal their identity. Second, discredit their good name. Third, sway public opinion to support the death and/or long term imprisonment of Los Plantanos.

The CIA Imposters successfully exploited North America's ignorance of true Plantain color and managed to go undetected for months posing as yellow freedom fighters named Pablo and Pedro. The two CIA Imposter Plantains quickly launch their campaign to besmirch the reputation of Los Plantanos. The Imposters dealt several blows to Los Plantanos' credibility by vandalizing graveyards during the daytime, tripping girls on rollerblades in rush hour traffic and smashing fruit stands at every major transportation hub west of the Mississippi. After several weeks of unchecked Plantain chaos some people become suspicious of their curious yellow color. The CIA Imposter Plantains, concerned that their cover might be blown, decided to hit Los Plantanos with the big political guns, a public scandal.

Armed with a deadly banana tree blight, bio-engineered in a Washington DC lab, the CIA Imposters Plantains launched hundreds of clandestine bio-terrorist attacks on banana farms all over the world. The CIA imposters wanted all fingers to point to Los Plantanos so they made sure to always plant plenty of evidence for authorities to find. Their most common "plants" included broken 22 Oz Corona beer bottles, big black mustache hair, and popular Los Plantanos slogans such as "Los Plantanos No Son Amarillo!" and "Plantano Power Grande" spelled out with banana mush on walls. The CIA Imposters even left black and white photographs of what appeared to be the Plantain Twins injecting the poisonous blight into banana trees.

Naturally, the good people of America were shocked by this unforeseen wave of Plantain terrorism. Not only was the American way of life threatened but America's God given right to banana splits was in jeopardy. America was thrust into a crisis as it realized life without the long yellow fruit would be unbearable. All evidence pointed to Los Plantanos as the culprits responsible for the banana butchery and anti-plantain sentiment swept the nation quicker than rumors of a Cuban missile threat.

Government-controlled media fostered the "Plantain scare" with a month-long news series entitled, The Banana Killing Fields: Good Plantains Gone Rotten, The fact that Los Plantanos publicly celebrated their Plantain identity and championed Plantano Power did not help their case. Although Los Plantanos had made a commendable effort in educating the world on the differences between plantains and bananas, the spotlight of the international scandal put them in between a rock and hard place - a perilous position for soft-centered fruits.

Days before Los Plantanos were to stand trial before a federal judge on 220 accounts of intent to eradicate, the CIA conspiracy was blown wide open at Ballroom Blitzed NYC. The CIA Imposters detained Los Plantanos and took their place as the hosts for the evening's fan contest. The CIA Imposters didn't know when to quit and tried to rob two fans of their wallets in front of 300,000 New Yorkers. Miraculously, Los Plantanos managed to untie themselves from their chairs backstage and rushed the Danger Cage to save the shocked audience from the Imposters. Los Plantanos revealed the CIA imposters as phony plantains and cleared their good name by delivering a beat down of epic proportions. Unfortunately the slippery bananas managed to escape before they could be brought to justice and the tropical fruit grudge match has raged on ever since.

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