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Kaiju Big Battel
RoBox Rumble!

It's exactly what it says

KRC Initiates "Mean 13" RoBox Rumble

Since returning from his secret fact-finding mission, questions have arisen as to what exactly RoBox has been up to in the last few weeks. All we knew was that whatever research and calculations were being done, it all had something to do with "Mean". Experts debated, fans speculated, but no one could quite tell what exactly it all meant, but finally, the Kaiju Regulatory Commission answered just about everything this week.

Next Friday, April 3rd, at the Warsaw in Brooklyn, Kaiju in 3-D will feature the first-ever Mean 13 RoBox Rumble; a battle royale extraordinaire of epic proportions. You read that right; Thirteen Kaiju monsters will enter the ring, one every minute, in a match so big only the meanest Kaiju around have been invited. Evidently, RoBox's mission was to scour the Earth and beyond to find out just how mean some of the monsters of the world are. The participants of this match, and the inevitable chaos that will ensue, are the result of this expedition.

So what will the winner get? A future title shot? Millions of dollars? Who knows? RoBox has told us not to ask any questions, especially anything about why he's in charge of the show again instead of the Kaiju Commissioner. We will respect RoBox's wishes, although at the same time wonder aloud why the Commissioner isn't going to be at the Battel once again. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't come! Kaiju in 3-D is shaping up to be huge! Teppen vs Uchu, the Mean 13, Intern vs Vegetius, Furries defending their belts, and more to come!

Kaiju in 3-D
With Musical Guests Bryan Scary and the Shredding Tears
When: Fri, April 3rd, 8:00 PM
Where: Warsaw at the Polish National Home, 261 Driggs Ave, Brooklyn, NY
Tickets: $20, available at Ticketmaster

Uchu Agrees to Keep Swarm Out

A few weeks after Kaiju Champion Neo Teppen told his friend and fellow Kaiju Hero Powa Ranjuru to stay out of his upcoming Title Fighto, Uchu Chu has followed suit and told his Swarm to stay home as well. Although one must wonder about how much of an effect the added help actually has, both Teppen and Uchu say they're interested in a fair fight, especially since the smallest mistake could cost either of them their chance at the Kaiju Championship.

Teppen and Uchu do Battel next Friday for Teppen's title, but the big stipulation this time is that no matter who wins, there will never be another rematch for the title between these two again, as long as either holds the belt. If Teppen retains, Uchu will have to wait for Teppen to lose the belt before he can have another shot at the belt. Of course, there'd be no guarantee that would happen any time soon. But if Uchu manages to reclaim the belt once again, Teppen will have to wait for Uchu to drop the title, and no one wants to play that waiting game.

Uchu Chu is no stranger to fighting Kaiju Heroes, but the Space Bug leader isn't exactly evil, like, for example, Dr. Cube. No one fully understands Uchu's true motives, but those who have been around him know he is extremely competitive, and is willing to do anything to win. But as it becomes less and less of a sure victory with his Swarm present, Uchu appears to be willing to try and make this as fair a fight as possible, but knowing Kaiju Big Battel, very rarely will things go to plan.

Question of the Week?

Who ya got in Friday's finals, Wilbon? Amigos or Dai Hachi Hachi?

Buy More Better Fighto DVD!

Beetle and Toast to Finally Settle Differences in the Ring

After months of bickering, a failed first attempt at a grudge match, and even more hostilities that eventually resulted in the Kaiju Heroes being eliminated from the Double Danger Tandem Tournament, French Toast has agreed to face American Beetle next week at Kaiju in 3-D. But the match isn't without it's own fair share of Danger. American Beetle is so sure he will win, he has agreed to the condition that if Toast wins, the entire Warsaw crowd will have French berets stapled to their heads for the remainder of the night! More on this to come!

Powa Picks Gomi-Man out of Phonebook

Kaiju Hero Powa Ranjuru, looking for an opponent of her own for Kaiju in 3-D, has decided to stop waiting for some sort of grievance to occur between herself and another monster and instead randomly picked a name out of the phonebook to fight. The name she landed on? Dr. Cube's vile trash monster Gomi-Man.

"I mean, it's not 100% random," said Ranjuru, "If I'm shuffling the pages, I'm more likely to stop somewhere in the middle of the book as opposed to the beginning or end. I actually landed on Goldenrod first, but he died a long time ago. They should probably take his name out. But Gomi-Man was right underneath, so I figured I'd go after him." Ranjuru admits Gomi-Man hasn't exactly done anything particularly mean to her in recent memory, but with apparently no Commissioner to assign these roles, Ranjuru says she'll find enough motivation to knock the trash monster out.

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