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The Grudyin's Chest: A Pointed Debate

When Dr. Cube spawned The Grudyin from the genetic code of a rare ape and a species of giant angler fish, he knew he was creating a formidable enforcer for his Posse. What he didn't know was he was also creating the most controversial chest in all of Kaiju Big Battel. In partnership with both the Kaiju Regulatory Commission and Dr. Cube's Posse, kaiju.com presents both sides of The Grudyin chest issue.

The Grudyin is Obscene!
By Louden Noxious

I don't know about you, but when I watch a Kaiju Big Battel I expect clean, wholesome mayhem in a Danger Cage. But now, thanks to Dr. Cube, I'm forced to watch The Grudyin and its giant, pointy teats undulating all about. It's like watching some sort of R-rated go-go dancer in a seedy girlie bar on the outskirts of Atlanta, where the only thing more depressing than the human refuse all around you, is the realization that no amount of exotic dancing will ever replace the way she used to smile at you... Not that I would know anything about that!

Look, I understand that this is the oughts, and we're all desensitized to gatuitous nudity, but would it really hurt to cover those things up? I guess it would be asking too much for a bastard person like Dr. Cube to respect the moral fiber of our society. Well I say "Down with Cube! And Down with The Grudyin's Teats!"

Fear The Grudyin's Chest Spikes!
By Dr. Cube

Fools! The Grudyin is the most fearsome beast in my Posse. From his powerful, limb-crushing jaw, to his flesh-ripping teeth, The Grudyin is the consumate killing machine. And if its foes manage to keep their hands clear of its gaping maw, they are faced with an even more deadly threat - The Grudyin's manly chest spikes!

As hard as a rock, The Grudyin's chest spikes will pierce the flesh of any opponent caught in The Grudyin's unrelenting embrace. What is more, these deadly lancers secrete a paralyzing poison of my own creation. How fiendishly brilliant!

So to all the childish morons out there, I say mock all you want, but one day you may find yourselves on the receiving end of a face full of The Grudyin spikes! Boo-yeah!

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