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Kaiju Big Battel
New Vegetius Vinyl Toy

Sweet Laser Background Not Included

Vegetius Toy Unleashed

Just a few days ahead of the San Diego Comic-con (July 24-28), feral beast Vegetius has reared his beaked head! This beautifully painted, imported Vegetius figure is the second release in the Kaiju Big Battel X Marmit line from Japan. This posable vinyl figure stands approximately 12" tall and is ready to Battel Sky Deviler. At $65 per figure these collectible gems won't last long, and are limited to one figure per customer. Buy one now before the Con when both the original and the Comic-con exclusive glow-in-the-dark variant are sure to sell-out!

Kevin Kicked to the Curb

Just a few short months after losing the Kaiju Championship Belt to Neo Teppen at the New & Improved Boston Massacre, Call-Me-Kevin has been kicked out of the Sea Amigos by his former friends D.W. Cycloptopuss III and Unibouzu. The move was not entirely unexpected, as relations between the two parties had been decaying ever since Call-Me-Kevin first won the Championship last year in Brooklyn.

On two separate occasions this year, CMK was nowhere to be found when Unibouzu and Cycloptopuss sounded the conch shell for his help. On the flip-side, they cost Kevin a victory at NY Blackout by holding him down while The Grudyin tenderized his fishy flesh. Their last team effort was a loss in the 2008 Chikara King of Trios Tournament, and the writing had been on the wall ever since. Check back with Kaiju.com as more on this story as it develops!

Comic-con Happenings

Some of the exciting things happening at this year's San Diego Comic-Con:

  • Kaiju Big Battel will be holding it down in Booth #4632.
  • The casts of Stargate: SG1 and Stargate: Atlantis will compete for who can draw the most-autograph seekers. The losers will be beaten mercilessly by Jaffa cos-players.
  • A super limited-edition variant of the brand new Vegetius vinyl toy from Marmit will premier.
  • Hollywood will reveal their next big comic-book movie - Archie + Veronica 4-Eva, a modernized reimagining of the Archie Comics Universe, from the producers of Cruel Intentions.
  • People will demean themselves for promotional merchandise.
  • Kaiju creatures will appear throughout the Con for your autograph-signing pleasure.

Beav Suspended

Kaiju Big Battel's "Eager News Beaver" Beav Wallace has been suspended by the Kaiju Commissioner for 30 days after an altercation with an investigative reporter. Wallace was reportedly backstage after judging a celebrity chili-eating contest, consoling heavily-favored runner-up Frankie Muniz after his devastating loss to Tawny Kitaen, when a local reporter and asked if Kaiju Big Battel was "fake". Wallace reportedly became irate and slapped the journalist repeatedly while shouting "Is this fake?! Does this feel fake to you?!" Muniz escaped injury.

Wallace was escorted from the building after being restrained by fellow judges Danny Bonaduce and the guy who played Donkeylips on "Salute Your Shorts". The Beav would not answer any questions immediately, but has agreed to an interview next week, hopefully of a nonviolent nature.

Kaiju Seeks New
Web Wrangler

Kaiju Big Battel's longtime web wrangler is very tired and is seeking a responsible, motivated designer to handle the day-to-day business of the Kaiju website. This is an excellent opportunity to join the Battel team, and work with a dynamic and creative Studio Kaiju staff. The perfect candidate is a wiz at HTML and CSS, has a designer's eye, and loves the Big Battel. PHP is a plus, but not required. Compensation is meager, but the creative rewards are substantial. New web wranglers will have an opportunity to explore new creative directions for kaiju.com, and craft the online presence for the universe's premier monster Batteling organization.

If you are interested, please email rob@kaiju.com, and put "New Web Wrangler" in the subject. Please include links to some sample work.

Boulder Begins Filming on "Chicago Taxi"

Steam-Powered Tentacle Boulder, noted Kaiju Hero and respecter of mothers worldwide, began filming today for his new feature film vehicle "Chicago Taxi". The movie, which Boulder's lawyers stress has nothing to do with the Academy Award-nominated Gary Busey film "DC Cab", stars Boulder as a wise-cracking taxi driver amongst a crew of wacky misfit cabbies in Chicago. Boulder has already been signed for the film's sequel, tentatively titled "Chicago Taxi 2: Citizens on Patrol in Miami Beach: City Under Siege", which begins production next week.

Pre-Order the Shocking Truth DVD

Vegan Vampires

In the most blatant case of Kaiju-related copyright infringement since the Kaiju Commissioner lifted the spelling of Battel from Edmund Spenser's Faerie Queene ("To proue his puissance in battell braue"), a new literary phenomenon has apparently lifted the term "Vegan Vampire." Apparently the phrase is used to describe the vampires in author Stephenie Meyer's wildly popular Twilight Series. Some in the Big Battel community have reacted with outrage at this supposed rip-off of Kaiju legend Vegan Vampire's name, but the Commissioner sees it differently:"

"If the appearance of the term "vegan vampire" in the Twilight series leads 13 year old girls and adults who enjoy books written for 13 year old girls to stumble across the pro-animal rights legacy of Vegan Vampire, I am only too happy."

Teppen Goes Green

In light of recent astronomical increases in oil prices, Kaiju Hero and Grand Champion Neo Teppen has taken steps to become more environmentally responsible. The man with 27 secret powers has begun recycling his shoulder pads, which tend to break whenever he gets in a fight, and perhaps more importantly, his Rocket-Powered Space Cycle is seeing considerably less use.

"It only gets .18 miles per gallon, so whenever I need to go to the store, visit someone nearby, or prevent a 327 foot demonic baby from leveling a nearby shopping mall, I just walk or take a bicycle," Teppen said today. "Right now, I'm working on finding alternative fuel for the Space Cycle. Sentai Jin built me an engine that runs on milk, but then I realized milk is also $4.19 a gallon."

Calendar Kaiju

There's all manner of Kaiju events coming up:

Kaiju Appearances:

  • July 24-28 at San Diego Comic-con in San Diego, CA

Live Big Battels:

  • Aug 23, Classified Battel, Location TBA

Question of the Week

Which Kaiju should compete in this year's Olympics?

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