Dr. Cube Likes Knives

Dr. Cube History Month

Every February, Dr. Cube fans, family, and friends from all over the world celebrate Dr. Cube History Month. This annual tribute to the evil doctor dates back to 2001 and is thought to have been founded by Cube himself to ensure that his rightful place in Kaiju history is accurately recorded and reported. Special attention is given to all the glorious victories, powerful speeches, and horrific monster creations that have brought him closer to his goal of world domination.

Dr. Cube History Month isn't just about the megalomanical madman himself however. Cube also uses the month as an opportunity to toast the most menacing members of his Posse, including Hell Monkey, SDS-1, Gomi-man, and the super-cute but super-evil Dino Kang Jr. The month will be punctuated with parades, declarations, and broadcasts of live monster mayhem to 50 million plus cable subscribers. According to Dr. Cube, Cube History is not just about Dr. Cube, "It's about recognizing every drop of blood, sweat, and tears from every monster, Minion, and man that have ever dedicated their lives to my quest for world domination."

Be sure to check back every week this month as kaiju.com celebrates Cube History Month with new interviews, commentaries, and news updates on everything Cube.

Minion Watch: Million Minion March

Dr. Cube announced this week that he now has 10 million registered supporters of his Posse. For years, the number of Cube supporters was rumored to be in the low millions, but after Cube's victory over Unibouzu for the Kaiju Championship Belt was televised on G4 TV last week, million more joined the ranks of Dr. Cube's Posse. This official declaration of force has confirmed what Kaiju specialist have suspected for months - that the cable TV platform is enabling Cube to recruit more supporters than ever.

Cube's announcement of his "Ten Million Minion Militia" has put the KRC and the Kaiju community on high alert. Moreover, as part of it's recent spy initiative, the KRC intercepted a Dr. Cube fan email that detailed the organization of a "Million Minion March" in front of the downtown KRC HQ on Friday, March 31st. The KRC verified its source and believes that the threat of the Minion March is real. Subsequently, the KRC has raised the "Danger Can Happen" color alert status to electric blueberry razzle-dazzle, the 73-tiered alert system's 3rd highest level.

When reached for comment, the Kaiju Commissioner said "I only pray that we aren't forced to raise the alert level to neon pink/lemon-lime day-glo plaid, or, god forbid, brown. The growth of Cube's Posse must be stopped."

Cube Fan Crowned King

Dr. Cube History Month is an opportunity for everyone to celebrate the things that make Dr. Cube great - his dedication to pioneering monster creation, his love of razor-sharp invasive surgical tools, his fashionable promotion of "blood soaked and tattered" as the new black. All of these qualities and more are captured in Sam Maus' stunning rendition of Dr. Cube and two of his fiendish friends. Not only has Sam's drawing captured the true spirit of Dr. Cube History Month, it's also earned him the title of Kaiju Fan King! Sam, your Dr. Cube shirt is on its way.

Enter now to win next month's Otaku Fan Art contest. March is dedicated to Los Plantanos Solidarity. Email all submissions to contest@kaiju.com.

Call-Me-Kevin Ensared in Gambling Probe

Reports out of New Jersey this week have implicated Kaiju Rogue Call-Me-Kevin in a Kaiju gambling operation that took millions of dollars of Big Battel bets, including some from active Big Battelers. In partnership with a corrupt KRC agent, Call-Me-Kevin would take bets on the outcome of Big Battels, the over/under on how times Louden would drop an f-bomb, and even ran a so called "squares game" which involved placing wagers on which side of Cube's helmet would land face-up during Battel. According to law enforcement sources several active Kaiju are suspected to have placed bets with the gambling ring. While legendary Kaiju Hero Silver Potato has not been implicated, his late lady friend Anna Dramina is rumored to have placed more than $500,000 of wagers in one moth alone.

The KRC is monitoring the situation closely, but according to one source, it is not believed that Call-Me-Kevin's involvement included throwing Battels since everyone bets against him anyway.

Cube Denies Failure, Fatherhood

Dr. Cube has publicly denied that he was the creator of the failed one-eyed kitten monster named "Cy." Andria Churchman, the kitten's owner, confessed to Super Wrong that she was once a card-carrying member of Dr. Cube's Posse. She claimed that she had renounced her Posse membership after Cube insisted she force feed 3 red pills to her kitty on a daily basis. According to Ms. Churchman, Cube was in fact the father of the failed one-eyed feline beast. Dr. Cube however denies ever having a relationship with the both Ms. Churchman and her "freaky one-eyed kitten."

Ask Dr. Cube

this was written/sent by my 8 year old son, Bryan...

if this is great then after I win Mota narus arm I will join you to rule the world so that is why I want it because you won the kaiju champion and your evilnis is great so that is why your greatnes.

love
bryan

ps what is your phone number
ps I know that i make mistakes
ps I like your pose Dr cube
ps have a 3 man tag match with 3 of your minions that includes your super minion against 3 of the swarm
ps call me when i am in
ps create new minions and monsters
ps improve your traning skills

Dear Bryan and Bryan's Mother:

I regret to inform you that the Mota Naru's Arm contest ended months ago, but considering your enthusiasm for the my Posse (not to mention the letters p and s), I have decreed a special contest with an even more special prize. The contest is simple: Tell me which 3 Big Battels you want to see next on G4 TV's Action Blast. The winner gets a brand-named block puzzle and any one T-shirt of your choice from Dr. Cube's Merch Lab.

Send your submissions to drcube@kaiju.com. Contest ends on my birthday, President's Day, Monday, February 20th. As an act of goodwill to celebrate Cube History Month I will also award all runner-ups with the day off of work on the 20th.

You must thank me with your undying loyalty and your financial support.

Now get back to spreading the word of Dr. Cube.

Your "Evilness",
Dr. Cube

PS Take it easy on the PS's

PPS Yes, I know I just did it, too! And again, aarghhhh!

Question of the Week

Is Dr. Physics part of Kaiju Big Battel?