Kaiju Tools Get Email Updates Buy Kaiju's Debut Book Discuss Email this page
Kaiju Big Battel
Doll Dr. Cube and Doll Hell Monkey operate on Doll Silver Potato

Artist Recreation courtesy of Fan King Yumi

Cube Promises Potato?!

In a cryptically worded announcement this week, Dr. Cube made some interesting promises/threats/jokes about what he had planned for the big Kaiju Rally on April 1st. "On April Fool's Day I plan to make fools out of all you Hero-worshipping goons. A certain "new and improved" guber-tuber will be making his long awaited return and let me tell you he's not quite the dud spud you remember! Also Hell Monkey will be performing a belly dance or two at the Middle East Corner... April Fools! Ha Ha Haaaa Haaahh. Ha. Seriously he'll do it."

Kaiju experts are divided on exactly how much of Cube's rambling speech is actually a joke, the mere suggestion that Silver Potato, missing since being kidnapped by Cube's Minions last year, will be making his return has the Kaiju world abuzz. To witness what may go down as a monumental moment in Kaiju history, be there on April 1st as Kaiju takes over the Middle East Upstairs in Cambridge, MA to celebrate their 10th episode on G4TV's Action Blast.

Kaiju Rally Party
Carlisle Sound as The Kinks
Kaiju G4TV Video Installation
When: April 1st, doors at 9PM
Where: Middle East Club Upstairs, Cambridge, MA
Tix: 18+, $9

Too broke to join the party? Click here for info on how to win tickets.

Tandem Mayhem Ahead

Kaiju Tag Team controversy erupted this week as Dr. Cube announced that the Apes of Wraths (composed of Cube Posse members Hell Monkey and The Grudyin) will actively seek participation in the upcoming Kaiju Big Battel event. Cube has stated that the newly minted team is willing to face any and all comers to prove their self-appointed status as "Official Tag Team of Dr. Cube's Posse." While some Kaiju analysts are predicting this new tandem will invigorate the Tag Team talent pool, the announcement has stirred up some turmoil amongst Kaiju's more established tag teams.

Sources indicate that Napalean and SDS-1, long considered the power duo in Cube's army, are particularly upset, considering their long history as the preeminent contingent in Kaiju Big Battel. Meanwhile, the Rougue tandem of D.W. Cycloptopuss III and Call-Me-Kevin are viewing the upstarts Apes as the perfect opponents to herald the dawning of the Sea Amigos as a legitimate Kaiju faction. And of course, Kaiju Heroes Los Plantanos are on call 24/7, ever vigilant to the possible threat of a tag team tumble erupting at any time. With the open challenge made, it will be fascinating to see who answers the Apes of Wraths' invitation.

Now go buy a limited Apes of Wraths t-shirt, there are only a handful left.

Plantain Solidarity Day Next Wednesday

Pablo and Pedro Plantain will be observing their annual day of Los Plantanos Solidarity on March 21st. The Plantain Twins have long supported revolutionary causes throughout the world and are recognized as being even more "freedom loving" than even American Beetle. Every May 21st Los Plantanos and their fans celebrate by putting aside their struggle for 24 hours of food, friends, and funyuns. Still figuring out exactly how to party like a Plantain? In addition to skipping school or work, try one of these popular Plantain Solidarity Day activities:

  • Toast the spirit of the Plantain, the nobility of the worker, and the bravery of the moustache.
  • Lead an anti-Cube parade. Be sure to include at least two Meringue bands, and an assortment of tropical themed floats. Don't forget to conclude the parade by burning an effigy of the evil Dr. Cube.
  • Spend the day with your significant other. Dress up like Plantains. Then commence peeling to the song track of Babaloo's "What's in the Banana."
  • Buy some new camouflage. Saudi Arabian three-color desert DPM camo is really hot right now.
  • Eat a banana.

Pick one of these fun activities or create your own. Then drop the Kaiju Commissioner an email to let him know exactly how you plan to celebrate Plantain Solidarity.

First Fan King from Japan

Kaiju super fan Yumi has been named the Otaku Fan King for March. Yumi is not only the first official Fan King from Japan, but she's also an ace toy/doll designer as her winning entry (see above) proves. Yumi's entry beat out an extremely competitive field, including two new piece of Otaku Art, and two brilliant original Otaku creations - Casey M.'s Dr. Cube Snow Man and Alex D's Fuzzy Cube Dice, to capture the crown and a Dr. Cube Commi shirt.

Send your Otaku submissions to submit@kaiju.com. In recognition of Plantain Solidarity Day, a special award will be given to the best Plantain-related submission. You might even win a special limited-edition Plantain Pencil Pouch!

This Week on G4

This week on G4 TV the Beav's birthday jam is busted up by The Grudyin. Luckily Neo Teppen is in the house to make sure Louden's favorite co-host gets his present in one piece. Plus special bonus Batteling featuring Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle.

Pre-Order the Shocking Truth DVD

Ask Dr. Cube

Whazzup doc? You must have picked the bands for the Kaiju Rally, right? No way the Commissioenr picks such a rockin lineup. He's such a square. But you're a Cube, so you win!!!! Go Cube! - Davey C.

Dear Davey C.,

While your point about my dimensional superiority over the Commissioner is well-taken, the rest of your message is complete, and utter poppy cock. I had nothing to do with selecting the musical performers for this event. I have no idea what "Jay Punk", the "Kinks", or "Horror Core" is, but I'm pretty even sure it's probably just some sort of ignorant American-by-way-of-Japan rock and roll rubbish.

If it was up to me the music would be delivered by a Baroque Quartet led by a devilishly handsome Margaret Thatcher look-a-like. Now that, would be entertainment. Unfortunately you'll have to settle for a night's worth of rock and roll spectacle from Peelander-Z, Gelatine, and Carlisle Sound. I pity your ear drums, and your posterior, which is likely to be thoroughly rocked by the end of the evening.

Get Bird Flu,
Dr. Cube

Do you have a question for Dr. Cube? Email it to drcube@kaiju.com, and then hope one of his Minion interns reads it.

Girlie Shirts In Stock

The Kaiju model, Suzy, is back to show off the latest Kaiju Girlie Shirts. Both the Sea Amigos and Los Plantanos Solidarity designs are exclusive to kaiju.com These designs are printed on high quality two-color, 3/4 sleeve raglan style shirts by American Apparel. Buy one of these sweat beauties while you still can.

Otaku Unite Gets Kaiju OK

The Otaku Unite Anime documentary is now on DVD for your viewing pleasure! Otaku Unite's director, Eric Bresler, goes way back with the Kaiju Commissioner and Eric somehow managed to get some very rare behind the scenes Kaiju footage. Rumor has it that there is even video of a naked Sky Deviler! Visit the Otaku Unite website for all the DVD details.

Intern Call

Want to work side by side with the Kaiju Commissioner and gain valuable experience in the monster entertainment industry? Studio Kaiju is actively seeking interns for this spring and summer. Check out the jobs page for the low down.

Question of the Week

Where's the upcoming Big Battel?

Bottom Border