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Gelatine Coming to Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII

Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII is shaping up to be the biggest Shpadoinkel Mania ever! Already it's been confirmed that Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle will be defending his Belt, and this week poster-fueled rumors have surfaced that Team Space Bug will be making a significant impact at Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII. Now, to top it all off, the Kaiju Commissioner has announced that the Big Battelers will be joined by special musical guests Gelatine. Kaiju insiders are calling Gelatine's Japanese horror-core stylings a perfect fit for a Halloweenish Big Battel date, and many expect the evilest musical performance in Shpadoinkel Mania history.

Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII
Featuring: Kaiju Big Battel with special musical guest Gelatine
When: Friday, October 20th. 7pm
Where: Avalon Boston, 15 Landsdowne St. (behind Fenway Park)
Tickets: Available at Ticketmaster.com and all Ticketmaster locations. All Ages. $15.25

All Out War Trailer

Before you can fully understand all the grudges, rivalries, and feuds that will be blowing up at Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII, you need to brush up on your Big Battel history. Study all the gory details about what led up to Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII by reading the Someone Must Die! and All Out War Battel recaps. Or you can just skip the reading assignment and watch the videos instead. The Someone Must Die! video trailer is now joined by the brand new All Out War video trailer. Watch both trailers now, and take notes - there will be a test!*

Next Contender?

Shpadoinkel Mania XVIII is less than two months away, but Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle has yet to choose his opponent for the Championship match. The Kaiju Commissioner has informed Soup's master, Master Wong, that the brutal noodle must pick his opponent by September 31st. Ever since Soup's victory at All Out War earned him the right to pick his Shpadoinkel Mania opponent, speculation has been running wild as to who will be selected as the #1 contender. Soup-haters believe the rogue Can will choose Super Wrong for an easy win, while others predict Soup will select a member of Dr. Cube's Posse. Other potential contenders include the evil Dr. Cube, starchy traitor Silver Potato, long-time rival Unibouzu, and Uchu Chu the Space Bug. With the deadline set, Danger levels are on the rise as each potential contender attempts to sway Soup's decision.

Controversial Minion Munchie Commercial

Dr. Cube's controversial Minion Munchie Commercial has been banned from MTV. Viacom, MTV's parent company, issued a statement this morning saying that Cube's new cereal is not inline with their wholesome corporate values. "This product is deplorable. It turns the children of America into mindless, morally bankrupt zombies with blank stares upon their faces." says Viacom VP, and former "Room Raiders", producer Mike Orcut.

Posse sources, however, report that Viacom's position has more to do with Dr. Cube's wholly owned subsidiary company, Slippers Not Dogs LLC, and it's $2.2 billion in outstanding Viacom advertising bills. Nonetheless, Viacom executives have assured the public that Cube's unpaid bills did not influence their decision to ban Cube's cereal commercial from their network. Watch the controversial commercial and decide for yourself.

New Action Blast Off

Kaiju commentators, Louden Noxious and Beav wrapped up another 4 blocks of Action Blast last week. The all new featured fightos include: Uchu Chu Vs Silver Potato, Dr. Cube Vs Dusto Bunny, Silver Potato Vs Unibouzu, and a terrific tag team matchup featuring Mota Naru and the late Sky Deviler taking on American Beetle and Slo Feng. Unfortunately, due to visa issues, the Tattooed Swami could not return for his scheduled cameo appearance, but GI Joe and the Transformers are still good to go. You can also look forward to a special Dr. Cube interview with Louden Noxious. The Action Blast hosted by Kaiju Big Battel can be seen everyday from 8-9AM EST on G4 TV. For more information and select Kaiju web-isodes please visit monkeybartv.com.

* There will be no test.**

Incubator of Doom?

Dr. Cube is reportedly building a super incubator machine on his small private island off the coast of Hawaii. Kaiju Regulatory Commission intelligence agents say the machine is capable of hatching over 100,000 chicken eggs at a time. KRC security analysts suspect that Dr. Cube is attempting to hatch some sort of new monster creation for the upcoming Battel and have recommended that the Commissioner deploy a Hero to investigate the oversized egg hatcher. Ever since Posse member Shrooma Tango was born from an industrial-sized outdoor pigpen, the KRC has maintained a constant vigilance policy in all cases of suspicious farming activities. So far, the KRC has blocked the birth of a routabega beast, foiled the fermentation of a yeast yeti, and intercepted an irradiated eggpplant creature. One can only hope that Cube's agricultural ambitions remain stymied.

Ask the Commissioner

Hi, My son just has a couple of questions, most of them are about the upcoming boston event. His first question is about the seating. You see, the tickets we bought say general admission but it also gives a seat and a row number. So his question is, if we show up early can we get better seats or does it matter. And my sons other question about the event is, are we allowed to bring cameras and/or camcorders? His last question is do you guys have any more copies of Mayhem in the Atrium 3? Cheers, Richard

Dearest Richard,

I am also very excited about the upcoming Spadoinkel Mania XVIII Battel. Despite the seat and row number on your ticket, this Battel is strictly general admission, so the earlier you get there, the better the spot. When it comes to cameras, as with all Big Battels, Kaiju fans and Danger documentarians are encouraged to capture the moment with the media of their choice. As for Mayhem in the Atrium 3, that VHS release has been out of print for five years. Unfortunately, Dr. Cube destroyed the master copy when he fire bombed the KRC self-storage unit back in 2001, so there is no chance that MITA 3 will ever be released again.

Thank you for your support and I look forward to seeing you at the Battel.

Your Friend,
Kaiju Commissioner

Hero Intern Update

After failing to protect the New Brooklyn Bridge at All Out War, the Hero-In-Training has been demoted to Hero Intern and re-assigned to Guatemala where he is restarting the Kaiju Hero Internship Program from the very beginning. In his new lowly position, the Hero Intern is not expected to fight at SHPADOINKEL MANIA XVIII on October 20th. The Intern did not return several calls for comment and appears to be in shame-induced hiding.

Super Wrong Balls

Despite his embarrassing roller skate incident at All Out War in Brooklyn, Super Wrong has been granted his Disco Balls. Super Wrong's debut into the world of merchandising was cut short after his pocket-sized Disco Balls were held up in a North Korean port by customs. The mirror-covered balls were finally released with the help of an officially KRC sanctioned bribe to the local North Korean harbor master. Super Wrong's signature Disco Balls will be marketed as "a party in your pocket" and are expected to hit retail shelves in time for the Halloween shopping season.

Deviled Egg in Stable Condition

After being rescued from Dr. Cube's Posse, the lone egg of the late Sky Deviler is now safe within the confines of Team Space Bug's H.I.V.E. Mung Wun the Thai Fly has been tending to the egg like a true giant, alien, insectoid mother. Kaiju experts, while unsure when the egg will hatch, are predicting that it will be a miraculous and beautiful event, much like a human birth, but with more slime.

Considering that the egg experienced some trauma while in the hands of Dr. Cube, some have suggested that the egg may not hatch at all. Others fear that voracious eater Vegetius has plans to use the egg to make a delicious space omelet. Such a loss would be a crippling blow to the unstable Team Space Bug, which has been largely absent from the Big Battel since the death of Sky Deviler in 2004. Stay tuned for Sky Deviler egg developments.

** Or maybe there will be...

Pre-Order the Shocking Truth DVD

Sick Beetle

American Beetle was hospitalized last week after suffering from several mysterious aliments including swollen lips, bloated pincers, and engorged mittens. The KRC's Paramedical Science Department is baffled by Beetle's illness but are determined to uncover its cause, provided the KRC authorizes the necessary funding. Nonetheless, the optimistic American Beetle is in good spirits and is reportedly honing his Xbox 360 table tennis skills while in KRC quarantine.

Revamp Girl Gear

The Kaiju Mall has revamped its girlie gear offerings by releasing the new Call-Me-Kevin and Mmm, Mmm, Bad Soup designs in both a classic American Apparel girl t-shirts and a 3/4 sleeve raglan shirt. There is also has a very limited supply of Soup Girlie Sweatshirts! The Kaiju Mall is also considering producing some "ladies only" designs and special apparel including "Danger Can Happen" thongs and "Traitor Tator" tank tops.

Join Kaiju

The Kaiju Commissioner is actively seeking Web, Video and Design Interns for the Fall semester. If you live in the Boston area and want to learn a thing or two about the live monster mayhem industry, check out the jobs page for full internships descriptions.

More Anime Explosion

More Anime Cons are joining the More Better Fighto Preview Screening parade (big thanks to all the Anime Cons that have recently screened More Better Fighto!). You can catch a screening of More Better Fighto at any of these awesome anime cons:

In addition to the screening, the Phoenix Anime Fest will also be welcoming as Guests of Honor several Kaiju monsters, who will no doubt be repaying the Fest's hospitality by reigning mayhem down upon the proceedings. If you are in the AZ area, don't miss this rare Southwestern Kaiju Big Battel appearance.

Want Kaiju at your con or anime club? Contact eric@kaiju.com for access to the Neo-Anime Big Battel Vault!

Limited-Edition Sunset

The limited-edition RoBox Plushies, Someone Must Die prints, and All Out War shirts are all sold out! The sun is coming down on a few other popular limited-edition items. So wake up and score them while you can:

As a special back-to-school bonus, all web orders over $40 get a free ten-inch Kaiju SD sticker designed by Vinnie Arnone (while supplies last).

Question of the Week

What's your sneaker size?

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